Developer, Part Three

So I spent the morning conversing with my favorite developer, via email. It went something like this:

“We need PHP 5.1.2, Apache 2.2.0, Java 1.4.1, and MySQL 5.0. We also require a four CPU machine and 8 GB of RAM.”

“I counter with PHP 4.3.9, Apache 2.0.52, Java 1.4.2 or Java 1.5.0, and MySQL 4.1.12, and a virtual machine until we can tell what exactly you need.”

“You are being obstructionist. Please give us what we ask for.”

“Actually, I don’t think my services will fit your needs. You might explore some other options. Go talk to our Windows techs.”

“We need this to run on Linux. Please help me. The Windows guys sent us to you originally.”

(ooh, they’re gonna die)

“Are you doing anything special that specifically requires these versions, or is this just the version you developed with?”

“It’s the version I installed on my Gentoo Linux box. I built them all from scratch.”

(How in the living, breathing f*** did this clown get Gentoo on a PC?)

“Would you mind if we tried it using the versions of things that come with Red Hat Enterprise Linux?”

“You aren’t using Gentoo?”


“You should.”

(WTF is it with Gentoo people that their OS is always better than everything else? I’m waiting for the onslaught of Ubuntu fanatics.)

“Let me know if your code uses features that are specific to those new versions.”

And now I wait.

2 thoughts on “Developer, Part Three”

  1. LOL. I found this weekend and I loved the header: iSwitchedBack (screw being cool, I have work to do)

    If the Gentoo guys love their OS, cool, but at least respect my reasons for not running it on my 200 machines…

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