F'in Small Towns

I am sitting in the parking lot of a motel in Tomah, WI, downloading Daft Punk from iTMS, poaching wireless, because Wal*Mart (yeah, yeah, I know, I’m desperate) had twenty copies of Dokken’s greatest hits but not Daft Punk’s “Homework.” Or any Daft Punk. Daft Punk? Who are they? No Target, no Best Buy, no music store in sight. Where in hell do these folks get their music? And why is it all f’in country and Christian? I mean, I like some Christian rock, but it takes so little effort to see a little bit more in life. God forbid you might like it.


And there was no freakin’ way I was gonna get the new Tool album from Crap*Mart. The last CD I got there was Nirvana’s “Incesticide” and they edited it. “Rape Me” became “Waif Me.” Like, WTF. Given that Tool is “black” rock I’d fully expect the Ass*Mart censor crew to screw with it. Sam Walton, I hope you’re rolling in your grave, because your store is the evil empire.

Sweet, my CD is done burning. People wonder why I get the big laptop, with all the extras. This is why. It keeps me happy.

Disclosure: I did buy a pack of Reese’s Pieces while I was in Jerk*Mart, so I can’t say too much. But $0.97 isn’t going to end the world.

Is it?

1 thought on “F'in Small Towns”

  1. Tomah…nice. I feel your pain my man. I bought my first and last CD from the Mart in Manitowac, WI last year on my home from a customer visit in Green Bay. It was Eminem’s Encore album. It took me a few minutes to realize it was an edited version. The thing that strikes me is that a lot of these are clearly edited with the artist’s cooporation. The Eminem album was for sure. Dolla bill yall, dolla bill.

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